Pain in Reconciliation
by CharWolfe
Summary: Alternative Greta and Zoe meeting. Max's past is something he has kept hidden from his life at Holby. When an old face shows up, Max is forced to come clean about everything, and decide whether his heart lies in the past or the future. ZAX finally
1. Chapter 1

**Alternative Zoe and Greta meeting, with a face from Max's past. Feel like Max's story deserves some more attention, even if it is only in my imagination. I haven't written fanfiction in over 4 years, but hopefully it will improve with time and practice!**

"Yes Mum, seven o'clock," Max smiled into the phone, "Yeah, see you there." Filled with excitement, Max walked up behind his girlfriend and wrapped his arm around her waist.

"Not here Max!" Zoe grumbled, laughing. Their relationship had been a secret up until last week, where Zoe's very public display of affection alerted all of their workmates to their closet relationship.

Max withdrew and held his hands up in joke surrender. "How about we go out tonight?" he smiled his famous Max grin.

"Oh, that would be nice, I know this fantastic Italian restaurant in Holby—" Max cut her off.

"Well I actually already made plans, The Seven Oaks, seven o'clock," Zoe looked at him strangely, wondering what he was upto, "with my mum." Zoe breathed deeply, this sounded like her idea of hell, there was no way Max's mum would approve of their relationship.

"Max, I'm no good with parents." Zoe sighed. She could see in Max's eyes how much this meant to him, and the last thing Zoe wanted to do was hurt him.

"Zoe, please, for me, I know she will love you, because I love you, more than anything in the world." Max pleaded, following Zoe around the nurses station. "Come on, I promise it will be fun."

Zoe raised her eyebrows, "I'll hold you to that Mr Walker, now go do some work," Zoe smiled and turned on her heel, walking towards cubicles, trying to figure out a way to get out of tonight's plans.

Lofty jogged to catch up with Max, who was in the staffroom getting changed. "Pub?" he questioned like an excited puppy.

"Sorry, Zoe's meeting my mum tonight." Max smiled, while lofty let out a deep laugh.

"Zoe, and your mum? You think that's a good idea?" Lofty questioned, concerned for his best friend or just missing his drinking buddy.

"They are going to have to meet at some point, may as well be tonight!" Lofty raised his eyebrows and patted Max on the shoulder. Mouthing 'Good Luck' and leaving the staffroom.

Max held his head in his hands. As much as he loved his Mum, he could appreciate how she had always intimidated Max's friends. Greta only wanted what was best for Max, and always didn't mean to cause offense, or that's what she'd always said after the fact.

Zoe stood in the doorway to Connie's office, watching her battle through paperwork effortlessly. Zoe shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "Something I can help you with Dr Hanna?"

"I was just checking you didn't need any help tonight, I noticed you were on a double shift, and with Dylan being away…" Zoe trailed off, knowing full well her offer of help is out of character and is most likely to be met with a scoff my Connie.

"Dr Hanna, your porter has already asked me to make sure you have no work ties this evening." Zoe sighed in annoyance. Where did Max get off interfering in her life, or maybe he just knew her far too well. "May I offer you some advice?" Zoe raised her eyebrows and scoffed. "I'm going to take that as a yes, nothing worth having comes easy Zoe, without sacrifices or risk. Sometimes you need to do things you don't want to do to contribute to others happiness." Connie focussed back on her paperwork, as if a silent indication that the conversation was over. The one thing Zoe liked about working with Connie, was how impersonal she was. And as much as Zoe wanted to offer to shove her impromptu advice somewhere uncalled for, Zoe did the mature thing and stormed out.

Sitting down at the nurse's station, Zoe thought about what Connie had said. As much as she used to despise the other woman, she couldn't help but see a softer side to the clinical lead. She supposed meeting Max's mother might not be as unbearable as she imagined it to be. Max was important to her, and if this was important to Max, then it was worth it.

"Hey, you ready?" Max's soft voice broke Zoe out of her thoughts, smiling at her boyfriend, Zoe nodded, smiling.

"I'm just going to grab my coat, meet me at the car?" Zoe said, walking towards the staffroom. Opening her locker, a shiny lighter caught her eye. The lighter Max had given her for her birthday, and then used to 'refuel' their fire. Sometimes Zoe thought if Max hadn't been saying those things to her, she would laugh at how cheesy they were. But nothing mattered when she was with Max, he made her feel like a mature woman and a giddy teenager all at the same time.

On the other side of Holby, Greta sat at the bar, nursing her gin and tonic, waiting for her plan to come to fruition. Greta was very proud of her only son. Max had always been the complete opposite to his father, kind, thoughtful, was never afraid of his own emotions. He had been through a lot in the past 10 years, but their recent conversations had led her to believe he was truly happy and settled in Holby. The time had come, Greta thought, for a reconciliation she had been waiting for.


	2. Chapter 2

Quarter to seven. Greta smiled, finally after a decade, she would get to see Max's eyes light up like they used to. It had pained her, watching her only son going through the hell so young. With far too much responsibility on his shoulders by the time he had left school. Max's father had left them before Max was 12, something in which Greta was glad for, she got to raise her son the way she wanted to. She was so proud of the man he had turned into. Proud at how he had taken responsibility for his family, and overcame some terrible parts of his past to become the cheerful Max of today.

Her phone ringing caught her out of her reverie. "I am going to be late I'm afraid, my flight was delayed but I am on my way, really looking forward to having a girly night." The woman on the other line rushed.

Greta laughed, "Oh poor you, don't worry about being late, I'm just getting tipsy waiting for you. Oh, I just had a call from Max, he works in Holby now." Greta heard a sharp intake of breathe. "He is doing well." Greta heard silence on the other end of the phone which began to panic her. "Amelia, I'll see you soon." Hanging up, Greta gritted her teeth, the plan wasn't going as well as she had hoped, but as well as could be expected. Greta ordered another drink and waited for her son and Amelia to turn up.

X

Amelia stepped out of the taxi, her red heels clicking against the pavements of Holby. Everything in her head was screaming to get back into the taxi and get on the first flight out of England. But her heart wouldn't let her go. She had agreed to meet Greta on a whim, after calling her to get the name of a landlord. Greta had been like a mum to her growing up, and Amelia knew she cared about her deeply. It had been three years since she had seen Greta, three years since she had stood on British soil and three years since she'd worn anything resembling the dressy outfit she was wearing tonight.

The complication with tonight was as much as Greta promised a catch up and drinks, Amelia knew she would try and slip Max into conversation at all costs. And Amelia wasn't quite sure she was ready to talk about Max again.

It had been ten years since she'd last seen Max Walker.

Ten years since they'd stood in their flat and screamed at each other until no words remained unsaid. Ten years since she had watched Max fall apart right in front of her, crumpled on the floor as a mere shadow of the man she had fallen in love with. It had been ten years since the last night they cried themselves to sleep, when finally she couldn't take it anymore. Ten years since Amelia walked out and never looked back.

X

Max held Zoe's hand tight as they walked towards the bar, he felt her stiffen, Zoe was nervous, that he could deduce without a fancy medical degree. He was excited to see his Mother, but slightly concerned about why she had asked to see him. They were close, phone calls regularly but his mother rarely ventured back to Holby to visit. Had Robyn had phoned and told her about Zoe? Max couldn't figure out why else his mother had demanded this meeting.

"You ready?" Max shot behind him, smiling at his girlfriend. Squeezing her hand in support.

"As I'll ever be." Zoe smiled back, still unsure but it was far too late to run now. Max kissed Zoe's forehead, a silent gesture of all of the words Zoe wouldn't let him say in public. _I love you, I am here for you, you are mine._

X

Max spotted Greta at the bar, holding Zoe's hand tighter as they walked towards her. As he walked up behind Greta, he suddenly felt nervous. Should he have brought Zoe without telling his mum? Max stopped as he noticed Greta flirting with the barman. Greta turned around still laughing. "Max, you're here!" She exclaimed, opening her arms. Max let go of Zoe's hand, and embraced his mother.

"Mum, this is Zoe. Zoe this is my mum, Greta." Max exclaimed, gesturing between the two women, his mum's unusual coldness confusing him.

"Zoe, how lovely to meet you." Greta smiled, although the smile didn't quite meet her eyes. Zoe smiled back, even though she felt like asking the ground to swallow her up. "Max, you didn't tell me you were bringing someone." Greta said with a false smile.

"Let's get a table." Max sighed, he had a feeling this meeting would go exactly as Lofty predicted.

X

Amelia walked along the river front, she was now over half an hour late to meet Greta, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Life had been much easier back in Africa, her time had been spent helping others, and fighting for a better world. Amelia couldn't believe how selfish every thought she had since she had arrived back in the UK. And selfish was the one thing Amelia never wanted to be. The last thing Max had said to her was how selfish she was, and the memory still stung as if it were yesterday.

X

"So Zoe, when did you qualify? Must have been very difficult." Greta remarked

"Yes it was," Zoe smiled, sipping her drink. Smiling curtly she continued, "You're trying to ask how old I am."

"Yes but I was trying not to be rude." Greta smiled, not even trying to hide her distaste for Max's new girlfriend.

"I'm forty."

"I'm forty eight." Greta exclaimed, though joy was not the intended emotion. Max held Zoe's hand in support, this was exactly what Zoe had been afraid of happening.

The door to the pub opened and a tall blonde walked in, searching for someone. Max took a swig of his beer and attempted once again, to start a normal conversation between the three of them. "Oh Mum, you should've seen what Robyn did the other night…" Max started, only to be cut off by his mum.

"Amelia, over here!" Max's head shot round as Greta gestured to the blonde. Their eyes locked in a terrifying thrash of emotions. Amelia walked towards the table, unable to form words.4

"Amy?" Max breathed heavily, unable to believe the woman in front of him was in fact who he thought it was. Various emotions rushing through, unable to choose which one. Anger, confusion, happiness even.

"Max, I am so sorry, I didn't know you were…" Amelia gushed, tears brimming in her eyes, until realisation dawned. "Oh my god Greta, you cannot play with our lives as if we are children anymore!"

"You set this up Mum?!" Max shouted, people were beginning to look around the pub. Greta stepped back, this was not the reunion she was hoping for.

"I am so sorry Max…" Amelia held his gaze before turning on her heel and rushing out.

"Look Max, I heard from Amy last week, and I thought it would be good for you to see each other again, I did not mean to upset either of you, and you have to believe me. I only want what's best for the two of you." Greta pleaded, holding Max's arms, forcing him to look at her. "How was I to know you were going to bring a date?"

Max pulled away, grabbing his jacket and Zoes hand. "I am so angry right now Mum. I am a grown man, the sooner you start treating me like one the better." Max stormed out of the pub, Zoe hot on his heels, leaving Greta to her own thoughts.

X

"Max, I am so sorry this wasn't the night you were hoping for. Let's head home and I'll make it up to you." Zoe murmured into his ear while they were walking home.

"No, I am sorry, can you get a taxi back to the flat? I need some time to think." He kissed her on the forehead and led her towards the taxi rank.

"Max come home and talk about it." Zoe pleaded, wishing Max would open up. "Please Max, I have told you about my past—"

Max cut her off, "this isn't tit for tat Zoe, and you can't compare sharing your relationship history to this… This is something I need to deal with on my own. Just leave it alright." Max slammed the taxi door and walked away. Leaving Zoe watching through the back window of the taxi as he walked away. Zoe bit back the tears, feeling further away from Max than ever, the exact opposite to what she had hoped tonight would bring.

X

Max sat on the ground, holding his head in his hands, the tears flowing freely onto the grass. After holding the pain at bay for years, all of those feelings had rushed up to the surface as soon as he seen Amelia. Her return made him feel like a child again, unable to control his own emotions or actions. All of his hard work the past few years had all came crashing down. Max wanted to scream, kick something, run, go anywhere but here. How his Mum could be so flippant about his feelings made him angry. She had lived through that period of his life with him, felt the pain with him of losing the two most important people in his life. Held him when Amy left him, alone, dealing with the remnants of their broken life. Max couldn't breathe, the sobs wracking his body.

Amelia watched from ten feet away, trying to hold back her tears. It hurt to know how much pain she had caused Max by coming home. Hurting him was the last thing Amy wanted to do. The rain started to fall on the graveyard but neither of them moved, both filled with guilt, pain and regret over the life they once lived.


	3. Chapter 3

**Just to clarify, the OCs name is Amelia, and Max calls her Amy for short.**

Zoe walked into Holby ED, a full night of tossing and turning, waiting for Max to come home, had left her restless and jumpy. Sleeping alone was something Zoe had gotten used to over the years, but had felt completely unsettled without Max next to her the previous night. Worry filled her eyes, Max _was_ ten years her junior, but surely he was mature enough not to have done something stupid. His shift started at the same time as Zoe's, so she hung about the reception desk, waiting to spot Max. She had never seen Max so unsettled as last night, yes their relationship was unconventional, but they could talk to each other about anything. Or so Zoe had thought.

"Max, where have you been?" Zoe jumped up as she spotted Max, head down, charging past her. Last night's clothes clung to him, damply and his hair plastered to his face. Following him into the locker room Zoe closed the door. "Max, please talk to me. I need to know you're okay." Zoe pleaded quietly. It was during this silence Zoe realised their previous difficult conversations had all revolved around Zoe's issues with Max doing the counselling. Having to help Max through issues was new territory for them, and it wasn't going well.

"I'm fine," Max insisted, grabbing a change of clothes and walking out of the locker room. Zoe sighed, frustrated at how helpless she felt. Zoe knew all too well how painful memories could be. And could see Max was dealing with a huge part of his past which he obviously hadn't dealt with properly when it happened. Zoe got up and continued on with her shift, hoping to bump into Max once he'd had time to calm down.

X

Amelia wandered around Holby, trying to find her bearings again in the town she grew up in. The ten years she had been away hadn't changed the town much. The shops were still similar, and minus some new flats and a fancy shopping centre, the place was just as she'd left it. Amelia had always planned on coming back here, this was the town her parents had fallen in love in, but year after year the prospect of seeing Max again just got scarier and scarier. She wandered through the iron gates of the graveyard. This was the only reason she had come back. To say goodbye, once and for all.

X

Zoe walked up to Max's DIY office, having not spotted him in the ED since this morning, she assumed he was hiding up here. Knocking first, Zoe walked through the threshold of Max's personal space. Max was slumped against the wall, his head in his hands, he looked as if he had been crying.

Zoe sat down next to him, and held out her hand. Max took it and relaxed into her. "I have tried so hard to get my life on track. And now I feel like a scared child again. I don't know how to deal with this, I don't know how to stop it from hurting." Max sobbed, and Zoe wrapped her arms around him.

"Max, I want nothing more than to take your pain away, but I can't help if I don't understand. I need you to help me understand." Max nodded but remained silent. The two of them sat in silence until the beep of Zoe's pager disturbed them. Zoe kissed him on the forehead, "I think you should go home, get some sleep, and we'll talk when I get home from my shift?" Max nodded and stood up, "I'll clear it with Connie, go home." Max nodded, grabbed his jacket and walked out. Leaving Zoe more confused than ever.

X

Max walked out of the ED, glad to be away from the glaring eyes of his concerned friends and colleagues. Max felt ridiculous, he felt like a hormonal teenager unable to control his emotions. Every time he let his mind drift back to the past, a solid weight compresses his chest and it takes every ounce of his being not to collapse on the floor and cry. Max reached the bridge, a few minutes and he would be home. Well back at his and Zoe's flat anyway, it didn't feel like 'home' yet, but he hoped in a few months it would be. Max's phone rang, and without looking, he answered.

"Hello."

"Hey." Max's breathing quickened. "Max, it's Amy, I was wondering if we could talk?" Max stayed silent, "If you're free right now…" Amelia trailed off.

"Come round to my flat, I'll be there in 5 minutes." Max riled off the address then hung up. Max took off towards the flat, dreading the conversation he was about to have with Amy.

X

Max jumped up off the sofa as soon as he heard the doorbell. He opened the door and stood to the side letting Amelia walk past. They reached the sofa, and Max gestured to sit down. "Max, I know this was a shock for you, and I am sorry to just crash into your life again after all of this time. But I am really happy to see you again." Amelia said, holding eye contact with Max. Amelia wasn't sure what Max was going to do, and it scared her.

The silence continued, then Max did something Amelia wasn't expecting at all, he opened his arms and held her.

X

Zoe walked in from her shift to see a sleeping Max curled up on the couch, Amelia in his arms. Zoe bit back her emotions. She tried not to be angry, but the frustration of not being in the loop was getting to her. She dropped her files on the coffee table, making a loud noise, causing Max and Amelia to jump up.

"Zoe, it's not what it looks like." Max jumped up, and brushed down his crumpled clothes. He had no idea why he felt so guilty, it's not like he had done anything wrong. "Amy came over to talk, then we fell asleep, it's been a long few days for both of us." Amy walked out to the hall and pulled her jacket on, this was awkward, and as much as she wanted to talk to Max, this wasn't a conversation she wanted to be a part of.

"You've shut me out Max! I feel like an outsider in our relationship." Zoe shouted, getting more and more frustrated at a silent Max. "Why won't you talk to me?"

"Zoe this isn't about you, or us."

Amelia cut in, "Sorry, I'm going to go Max, I'll call you."

"No wait—"

"No I need to go." Amelia walked out, Max stood between the door, and Zoe, who stood with her arms crossed.

"Max, we need to talk." Zoe challenged, forcing him to choose, Zoe or Amelia. Max looked between his two options. Right now, Max just wanted out of this awkward conversation with Zoe, so he ran.

"MAX!" he could hear Zoe shouting from the flat as he ran down the stairs, he could see Amelia 100 yards down the road trying to hail a cab, if he ran he could catch up with her. "MAX!" Zoe's voice was getting closer, she must be on the stairwell running after him. Max ran out of the door, up the street, shouting for Amelia, as she got into a cab. Max stopped and held his head in his hands, not only had he lost Amelia, but he'd also made Zoe mad. He turned around looking for Zoe just as the black sports car sped round the corner. It wasn't until the car was about to hit him that Max even noticed. Zoe screamed, watching the accident with horror. She ran across the road and knelt at his side, stemming the bleeding and praying Max would be okay.


	4. Chapter 4

The atmosphere was tense in the hospital room, Charlie stood at the end of Max's bed, looking over his chart, while Zoe and Tess sat on one side, with Amelia on the other. This had been the image of the room for the past 12 hours, where Max had remained unconscious after the car accident. The melodic beep of the cardiac monitor and rhythmic sounds of Max's breathing the only break in the silence. Max's eyes flickered and his eyes shot open, frantically he sat up and fought at the tubes and cables attached to him.

"Where is she? Where is Maddie?" Max shouted, struggling to sit up on the bed, Zoe, Charlie and Tess looked to Amelia as they tried to hold him down. "Somebody tell me where my daughter is!" Max shouted as everyone froze.

Amelia held his hand and stared into his manic eyes. "Max it's 2015, you were hit by a car. It's been ten years since the accident." Max looked at her with disbelief. All of a sudden Max stopped fighting the restraints and sunk into the bed. Tears began rolling down his face, as he realised his mistake. "Max we're going to put you to sleep again to allow your body to heal, when you wake up you will feel much better, I promise!" Amelia smoothed his hair off of his forehead, full of cuts and bruises. He nodded, leaning into her hand as she stroked his face. As Max drifted out of consciousness. The silence in the room deepened. Eyes bore into Amelia as she fought back the tears

"Max and I grew up together, started dating when we were in high school. Then I got pregnant," Amelia paused, eyes fixed on Max but fully aware of the three sets of eyes staring at her. "We did the responsible thing, got married. We were only 17 but I had money and we had it all planned out. Max would go to university first, then it would be my turn. We were happy, really happy, and Max was a fantastic dad. She was such a daddy's girl. We had the perfect little family, and I wouldn't have changed it for the world. Maddie was 5 years old when the accident happened, Max was driving her to her first day of school. A drunk driver came out of nowhere, Maddie was killed on impact. Max underwent months of physical rehabilitation before he could walk again. It was hell, Max blamed himself, and in my way I blamed him too. We stayed together for six months after. We were both hurting so badly and neither of us would admit it." Amelia sobbed, her chest heaving as she recounted the worst few months of her life.

"You don't have to tell me." Zoe offered, she could see how much pain Amelia was in.

"No, but I want to. Max needs you to understand, so he doesn't have to explain this to you when he wakes up." Amelia wiped her eyes and took a deep breathe. "One day I tried to kill myself, Max found me and had to give me CPR until the paramedics arrived. After that he couldn't even look at me. So one night I packed my bags and left. I changed my number and never spoke to Max again. At the time it felt like the right thing to do. Or the easiest, I don't know." Zoe reached out and held Amelia's hand, all negative feelings gone.

"I needed to come back and see Max again. I needed to apologise and check he was okay, before I could move on. And all I've done is hurt him even more." Tears streamed down Amelia's face as she held Max's hand. "Max is the most extraordinary person I have ever met, and he means the world to me. But I had to leave, I couldn't ruin his life any more than I already did."

Zoe sat, listening intently, she couldn't believe what she was hearing; Max was married. Max had never even mentioned his past, and now she knew why. Her whole head was spinning, the Max she knew was only a fraction of the person he was. A familiar voice pulled her out of her thoughts.

"Oh my Amelia what happened?" Greta ran into the room, taking Amelia into her arms.

"He will be okay, he was hit by a car but he will be okay." Greta nodded, tears rolling down her face as she sat down beside Max's bed. The three woman sat in silence, watching the man they all loved fight against his injuries.


End file.
